If Someone Uses These 15 Phrases, They Lack Empathy And Understanding

Konstantin Postumitenko

We all know those phrases that make us cringe a little when we hear them. Sometimes, it’s not just about being rude; it’s a sign that someone might be lacking empathy or a deeper understanding of the situation. If you’ve heard any of these phrases, chances are you’ve encountered someone who could use a little more compassion in their communication style.

1. “I don’t care.”

Konstantin Postumitenko

This dismissive phrase shuts down any further discussion or expression of feelings. It shows they’re not interested in understanding your perspective or empathising with your emotions. It essentially invalidates your feelings and experiences, making you feel unheard and unimportant.

2. “You’re overreacting.”

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This phrase minimises and dismisses your emotions, making you feel like your feelings are invalid or exaggerated. It shows a lack of understanding and respect for your emotional experience. By telling you you’re overreacting, they’re implying that your feelings are not justified or reasonable, which can be hurtful and invalidating.

3. “That’s not my problem.”

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This phrase is often used to distance oneself from the issue at hand, reflecting a lack of empathy for the person presenting the problem. It demonstrates a lack of willingness to help or offer support, making the person feel isolated and burdened. It implies that their problems are not worthy of their time or attention, which can be hurtful and isolating.

4. “Get over it.”

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This phrase invalidates your feelings and suggests that you’re dwelling on something for too long. It shows a lack of understanding of how emotional processing works and the time it can take to heal. It also dismisses the importance of the issue at hand, making you feel like your feelings are not valid or important.

5. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

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This phrase minimises the significance of your experience, making you feel like your feelings are not valid or important. It demonstrates a lack of empathy and understanding, as what may seem trivial to one person can be a major issue for another. It can be hurtful and invalidating to have your feelings dismissed in this way.

6. “Just be positive.”

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This phrase is often used to dismiss negative emotions, implying that they are not valid or useful. It shows a lack of understanding of the complexity of emotions and the importance of processing negative feelings. Toxic positivity can be harmful, as it invalidates genuine emotions and pressures people to suppress their true feelings.

7. “You’re too sensitive.”

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This phrase is often used to blame the person for their emotional response, rather than acknowledging the validity of their feelings. It implies that their sensitivity is a weakness or a flaw, rather than a natural human trait. This can be hurtful and invalidating, and can discourage people from expressing their emotions openly.

8. “You always/never…”

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These types of generalisations are often inaccurate and hurtful. They tend to focus on negative aspects of a person’s behaviour, ignoring their positive qualities. These statements can be damaging to relationships, as they create a negative and inaccurate perception of the person.

9. “Stop being so dramatic.”

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This phrase minimises and dismisses your emotions, making you feel like your reactions are excessive or unwarranted. It implies that you are being overly theatrical or exaggerating your feelings, which can be hurtful and invalidating. It disregards the intensity of your emotions and fails to acknowledge the validity of your experience.

10. “Why are you so upset?”

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While this phrase may seem like a genuine question, it can often be used in a condescending or accusatory tone. It implies that your emotional response is unreasonable or unjustified, shifting the blame onto you rather than acknowledging the validity of your feelings. It can make you feel like you need to defend your emotions, adding an unnecessary layer of stress and discomfort to an already challenging situation.

11. “It could be worse.”

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This phrase attempts to put your problems into perspective, but it often does so in a dismissive and unhelpful way. It minimises the significance of your current struggles and suggests that you should be grateful for not having it worse. It can be invalidating and insensitive, as it fails to acknowledge the pain and difficulty you may be experiencing in the present moment.

12. “You’ll get over it.”

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Similar to “get over it,” this phrase dismisses your emotions and suggests that your feelings are temporary and insignificant. It fails to acknowledge the depth and complexity of your emotions, and can make you feel like your pain is not valid or important. It can also be perceived as dismissive and insensitive, as it implies that your feelings are not worthy of attention or consideration.

13. “You shouldn’t feel that way.”

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This phrase invalidates your emotions and tells you how you should feel, rather than acknowledging your actual feelings. It can be extremely hurtful and disrespectful, as it denies your right to feel and express your emotions authentically. It can also make you feel like you are wrong or defective for having those feelings, which can lead to self-doubt and shame.

14. “I know how you feel.”

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While this phrase is often meant to be comforting, it can be dismissive if the person has not experienced a similar situation. It assumes that everyone experiences emotions in the same way and invalidates the uniqueness of your individual experience. It can be helpful to simply listen and offer support without claiming to fully understand their feelings.

15. “You’re being too emotional.”

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This phrase shames people for expressing their emotions and implies that emotions are a sign of weakness or irrationality. It can be especially harmful when directed at women, as it perpetuates the stereotype that women are overly emotional and not capable of rational thought. It’s important to remember that emotions are a natural and valid part of the human experience, and everyone has the right to express them without judgment or shame.